Jess Runs Away from Home...: A bangin' good time...

This last Saturday, I did one of the weirdest things I’ve done since arriving in this country, and certainly the weirdest thing I’ve done soberly since arriving in the country. I went to a themed DVD bang. DVD bangs exist in heavy concentrations throughout Daegu, and I presume that they exist in heavy concentrations throughout most cities in Korea. Essentially, a DVD bang is a small room, consisting of a high-definition television and a few pillows, which can be rented out for private use. The reason for their popularity (I presume) is because most young adults here live with their parents up until the time that they marry, and since most homes are very small, there are few places to get some alone time with a lover. Thus the DVD bang was born. I understand the concept. However, there are a few details about DVD bangs that leave me befuddled. First of all, if the real purpose of a DVD bang is to watch a movie in privacy, then most places have failed to meet this basic goal. The DVD bang we went to basically consisted of a long corridor that was vaguely reminiscent of the corridor seen in The Shining, down which there were maybe 7 or 8 rooms on either side. The rooms had walls, of course, but they only went up ¾ of the way to the ceiling, and doors were replaced with curtains. What this means is that, although they put a cap on how loud you can have the volume, you can still quite clearly hear other people’s movies and conversations (the latter of which we wouldn’t understand anyways). Another strange thing about the DVD bang was the movie choices. For reasons that don’t warrant an explanation, we opted to watch an American film with Korean subtitles, but our choices were pretty much limited to movies that were made sometime between 1995 and 2004. For this reason (and because we felt guilty for taking too long to make a decision because the DVD bang guy didn’t trust our level of competency enough to leave us alone with the remote), we ended up watching A Knight’s Tale, a really bad Heath Ledger film that seemed really good the last time I watched it at age 14. When we finally decided on a movie, we put it on pause and went out to the lobby to get some snacks. Most snacks (except beer) were included in the room rental fee, so we took full advantage of the ice cream, stale microwaved popcorn, Nesquik, Kool-aid, hot chocolate, tea, and toast. But there is one thing that makes eating toast and watching A Knight’s Tale in a semi-private room in Korea more bizarre than it already is. The thing that set this DVD bang apart from the others was its theme. Not every DVD bang in Korea has a theme, but every once in a while you’ll stumble across a precious gem that adds an extra layer of weirdness to an already weird concept. And in the case of Suu Café, this precious gem is teddy bears.

The rooms, rather than being painted in eggshell white or earth tones, were plastered with floor to ceiling hot pink wallpaper, which was sporadically dotted with brightly colored beach sandals and sunglasses. Decorating the walls was a white-framed oval mirror that looked like it came out of Snow White, and on either side of said mirror was an identical framed picture of what appeared to be an 18th century curly-haired toddler standing next to an unusually large display of roses. On both sides of the T.V. (also framed in white), there was a pink wall lamp, the shade of which had dangling pink jewels hanging from it. Just beneath the T.V. there were two tiny pink tables which would have been an ideal place to have high-tea with my stuffed animals and my alter-ego, Mrs. Clockone, twenty years ago. The curtains and pillows were of a matching fabric of rose prints and pink frilly trim. Sitting in the corner of the room was a large, light brown, somewhat melancholy teddy bear. We did our best to cheer him up. Originally, I thought that perhaps our evening at Suu Café would make me feel nostalgic for childhood. However, it mostly just made me feel like a Byung Tae (i.e. pervert).